
A week ago, an angel of a woman, and my friend Stephanie Godeck passed away. I haven't known her all my life, but I will remember her all my life. She is one of the many women that I came to know as a result of serving as Relief Society President (my church's service group for women). She came to church by herself and sat up front. She came for all the right reasons. Because she truly loved the Savior and came to be filled with his love each week as well as give love to others. She had a smile that lit up a room, and warmed your soul. She was caring and compassionate. She had time for everyone. This sounds like I am just rattling off a bunch of nice things, and no one could really be all that. But she truly was. You will never meet a harder worker or someone more devoted to service for others. She only weighed about 95 lbs. and even with a walking cast on one foot she would be at every hard service project we had. You know the one that no one wants to go to. The one where you have to clean bathrooms covered in a years worth of ......... (I am trying to block it out). I knew I could count on her being there every time with a huge smile on her face and a cheerful disposition. She would come with a bucket of cleaning supplies and go straight to work. What an example she was to me! You would think she was doing her favorite thing in the world! And she was, she was serving God by serving his children. She did not have the best health, yet there she was time after time. She never turned down an opportunity to serve. On one of these many occasions we had to make an hour long drive to the Bishop's storehouse to work for a few hours. On this trip she told me about her life. I was blown away. They are too personal and private to share, but I will say that I could not believe all that she had gone through in her life. A life that had a lot of pain and sorrow, yet she was who she was. Positive and happy. I saw first hand by knowing her that it is possible with Christ to overcome painful and damaging life experiences and still be the giver in life. She was able to heal through his love. Her greatest gifts in life were her three daughters. She talked about them constantly and how proud she was of them. She wanted all the best things in life for them. All the things that she didn't have. They told a story at her funeral that she told me first hand. That when she was working as a janitor she would take her girls with her, and have them clean toilets and tell them that if they didn't want to do this their whole life to get an education. She lived to see all three graduate from college. They are beautiful and successful women. One of her daughters was married and just had her first baby. Stephanie's first grandchild, and she couldn't be prouder.
I really felt a strong love for Stephanie. She reminded me of my Mom, a fighter. A woman that relied completely on the Lord and lived for her kids. Pretty recently Stephanie had a tough experience that really shook her because it affected one of her girls. It was a serious situation and I prayed and prayed for how I could help her. She wasn't answering my emails or phone calls and I didn't know how I could reach her and I knew I needed to talk to her even though she didn't want to talk to anyone. I felt to drive over to her house. There she was sitting in her car on the side of the road a street away from her house. She was just getting her mail, as she of course was out serving (moving rock for someone. REmember she is only 95 lbs!) I could see the look in her face of pain, and she did not want to let go of it yet. But my mom had been through a similar situation and I just wanted to tell her to not lose faith. That because my mom kept fighting I have all of the blessings that I do in my life. It was a tearful discussion, both of us in our cars and talking in the middle of the street. My prayers were answered. I could see that it was what she needed to hear. I told her all about my mom and how she was a fighter like her, but she got tired. She told me one night that the Lord had revealed to her when she was going to die. Of course, I just said, "oh, mother." and didn't want to hear it. I wasn't ready. Of course, she died when she said, and she was prepared and ready. As I told this to Stephanie, I got the impression that Stephanie knew exactly what my mom was talking about. That she also knew and was tired too. She had given all she could and was ready to go home. This last long conversation that I had with Stephanie gives me alot of peace in knowing that she knew and was prepared.
Her funeral was yesterday. I played violin at her funeral, as I did at my mom's. If you know me, you know it is really difficult for me to play for large groups of people. I did it for Stephanie. I didn't know if I would really be able to do it. I just kept saying over and over, "Stephanie, you had better help me!" For the first time, I played my part without a mistake. I was nervous I would be too emotional, and I wasn't (that came afterwards). I am so so happy that I was able to say I love you by doing one last little act of service for her, for her family, for her girls. I love you Stephanie. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for being the person that I will think of whenever there is a service that needs to be done early on a Saturday morning that isn't so fun. I promise, I will be the first one to sign up to help.